WTF Does This Mean?

Thursday, November 16, 2006

I had the most bizarre dream last night and I can only assume it’s due to what some may call my “obsession” with reality television. Perhaps those people are right…

I was on a tropical island with the cast of this season’s Survivor: Cook Islands. Not all of them, natch, as we were getting close to the merge (dream imitating reality?). However, the premise of the game wasn’t your standard Survivor fare. It was actually Survivor: The Biggest Loser. What can I say…I don’t dream often but when I do, they’re truly a unique experience. I don’t remember the entire dream but Ozzy was there and he kept asking me if I was ok. He was being very sweet and seemed genuinely concerned but I assumed he just wanted to get into my pants (what was left of them at that point) due to the recently acquired knowledge of his onscreen escapades while taking part in a Playboy reality show (warning adult content!). I told him to get bent. He cried. He then offered to shave my head for me – tempting as this was (and believe me it was), I said no. He cried again. I didn’t care. Jonathan was there but ignored me the whole time. Bastard. I didn’t recognize any of the other people there on the island.

Suddenly Jeff showed up and we were told we had to fly to Italy (awwww…bummer). We were instantly transported to a futuristic airport and were wearing clean, freshly pressed khakis (it’s a dream, go figure). There were moving sidewalks, see through ceilings and a beautiful star filled night sky. I was separated from the rest of the group (voted off the island?) and was standing on a moving sidewalk with a former friend, K. She was being very helpful, trying to get me to the correct departure gate on time so that I wouldn’t miss the plane. We were running all over the airport, checking out the departure screens which were always blank and getting more and more frustrated. K kept asking me how much 20Euros were in dollars. As she picked out the perfect eyeliner and lipgloss for me (she was great for stuff like that), I asked her if it needed to be US dollars or CDN? I then went on to explain the differences in exchange rates, and if I won the money (apparently the prize was the whopping 20 EU), it depended on where I was when I won, what currency it was paid in, and all the tax ramifications for each of the various scenarios. I woke up and realized that my cat hadn’t bothered me all night long.

I can only assume my brain is trying to tell me the following:
- it’s time to shave my head again (I finally did my legs a few days ago…eewwwww it had been a while)
- I don’t like Ozzy
- I like Jonathan but realize he’ll never be interested in me, even if he wasn’t already married
- While I don’t mind porn, I don’t want my Survivor contestants to star in any
- Jeff Probst knows my secret inner vacation fantasies
- I wish I could find khakis that look good and fit well
- I love buying makeup but hate to wear it
- I really want to travel
- Give it up sista…you’ll never be on Survivor (no departure time) If I did I’d be voted off right away (immediately separated from the group), and even if I went on and won, it’s not worth the money (after all the exchange rates and tax consequences in both the US and Canada).

If you have any other interpretations, I would love to hear them. I’d really like to be wrong on most of these things…


Sniffy said...

Had you been eating cheese?

Last night, I had a dream where I was at a petrol station and there were some Canadians (they had the Canadian flag on their rucksacks) and they looked like they wanted directions, but they didn't ask. And then there was a cat that had been run over and was mangled, but as I got nearer to him, his injuries became less severe and he regained consciousness. Then I woke up and it was all a dream.

I think this means that I am Jesus and that people are scared to ask Jesus for help, but animals aren't.

I'm not even a Christian.

You need to travel, I think you're getting restless. Are you due your period?

Karen said...

Yes, I love Cheese - I just finished off a bit of Jalapeno Havarti. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Yep, definately need to travel but no money to do so and none coming my way (that I know of) anytime soon.

My my Sniffy you're getting awfully personal there aren't ya? (But no...not due).

Sniffy said...

Not personal, just wondering - your temperature changes when you're due on and it can affect your sleep, that's all.

Wandering Coyote said...

I've been watching Queer as Folk lately. I won't even go into the kinds of dreams I've been having.

Red said...

Is that really Ozzy? Omigod!!! Strangely, in that picture when he comes out of the shower, he looks a lot like Bobby Jon, from Survivor... 11? Was he on this programme too? Ha ha!

Anyway, I have no idea what your dream might mean, but I am envious of the fact that your cat doesn't bother you in the night. Mine woke me up at 2.30am for the second night running. The problem is I can't go back to sleep until after 4am... cue a very tired Red.

But yeah, stay off the late-night cheese-eating sessions!

* (asterisk) said...

Ummm. Wow. I just don't know what any of this means!

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