Interviews of the Not So Rich and Famous - Ep5 - Dr. Monkey von Monkerstein

Sunday, March 30, 2008
On top of all the zombies, future Hollywood-types, family members, and hockey fans, I thought we'd throw in a professional to help provide a bit more of a serious tone to our interview series. Without further ado, I give you Dr. Monkey von Monkerstein.

1. Name, occupation, species.
Monkey Von Monkerstein
Troublemaker and Blogger
Speices, I loved that movie. Natasha Henstridge is a hottie.

2. Growing up, one of my favourite puzzles was one of the Great Grape Ape. I've never seen a cartoon/movie/comic of him so I have no idea who he was. What are your thoughts on this and was he really all that great?
My thoughts are I am deeply troubled that you had a favorite puzzle. I could see having a favorite doll or dress but a puzzle? What kind of sick child were you anyway?

3. Where did you go to medical school?
Psychotic State University.

4. You know, Doc, I've got this rash........
Aiiieee, get that rash away from me! I must stay pure and clean!

5. If curiosity killed the cat, what the hell did it do to George?
It whomped him upside his head. And then it took his wallet.

6. You feel that your life right now is far too blah so you've decided to take up Mexican wrestling. What's your wrestling name, catch phrase and signature move?
My name would be The Flying Gas Bag
My catch phrase would be "Pull my finger!"
My signature move would be the flying fart.

7. President Hillary Clinton.
Holy crap, did I fall asleep for 6 months again? Did I miss the election?

8. People often get monkeys and apes confused. Sure we could try to teach them about prehensile tails and South America vs. no tails and Africa but...how then would we explain Lemurs?
Think of lemurs like you would your distant relatives who irritate you. You put up with them only because you have to.

9.Who's the sexier primatologist: Dianne Fossey or Jane Goodall?
Jane Goodall because she's alive and Fossey isn't. And because Goodall also goes all the way on a first date.

10. If you could appear on any reality TV show, which one do you think you'd be likely to win?
Orangutan Island on Animal Planet

11. Planet of the Apes: Simian propaganda or good clean fun?
It's all good clean fun until Charleton Heston discovers what we did to the Statue of Liberty.

12. Do you think King Kong was just misunderstood?
Misunderstood and hopped up on steroids.

13. President John McCain.
Ok, now you're just f*cking with me.

14. Music has often been used as a method of torture. Which of the following do you think would elicit the most confessions: Liberace/Yoko Ono/Britney Spears
I must confess if I had to listen to any of them for too long I'd admit that the Franks were in the attic and that I stole the Lindberg baby.

15. If you were Chimp, would you have stayed with Tarzan for so long?
As long as Tarzen met my needs sure why not. He did look pretty damn good in a loin cloth you know.

3 comments:

Red said...

I agree with the Good Doctor on 14!

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Great interview! More fun than an episode of Crazy Monkeys on Land Mine Island.

Mommy said...

Oh COME ON! Dr. Monkey you could take Brittany, just feed her chicken wings until she passes out. ;)

LOVE this series.

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