Goodbye Grief

Monday, June 16, 2014
It’s been a while since I posted anything here and for regular readers, I hope you can forgive me. The past month has had its ups and downs which I haven’t had the energy to talk about until now.

First off, as those of you who follow me on Facebook and Twitter know, we had to make the heartbreaking decision to put my beloved Anubis down four weeks ago.  He’d been suffering from kidney failure/renal disease and it was the best option for him given its rapid progression. In all fairness, I probably should have made the decision much earlier but I had a terrible time admitting to myself that I had to let him go.  He went quickly and peacefully (Mom was with him – too upsetting for me), and I miss him beyond words.  Even writing this, thinking about him, I’m fighting back tears.  Nothing will ever fill the Nubs sized hole in my heart but I have a million wonderful memories of him over our 15 years together.
Nero is trying his best (as is Rocky) to help me heal.  He’s been cuddlier than normal, not as loud at 330 in the morning and adorably cute.  The two remaining boys realized quickly something was up when suddenly the old man was no longer around.  It took them both a while to adjust but things are settling. Our building’s manager is allowing us the opportunity to make a forever home to another feline despite the rules about only having two cats (long story; they’ve been very generous with us) but after careful consideration over the past month, I don’t think I want another cat at this time.  Nero deserves to get the kind of attention I didn’t give him when Anubis was alive.  I focused almost solely on my relationship with Nubs and often ignored Nero, and he ignored me.  Now is his time and I will give him the love and attention he deserves.  He’s about 13 years old now and getting on in kitty years.
In non-cat related news, I applied for a new job.  To be honest, I didn’t think I’d get an interview.  Since applying, I’ve had two.  Now, it’s wait and see time.  They should be making a decision by the end of this week but they haven’t called my references yet and I’m starting to worry.  At first, I didn’t care (much) if I got the job or not – I have a good job that I enjoy and people that I like working with.  The higher pay and responsibility would be nice but I wouldn’t be disappointed if it didn’t work out. Then I had the first interview.  I LOVE these people!  There were so many connections and great moments that I couldn’t have asked for a better interview. And then, the next business day, I was asked to come in for a second interview.  That one? I’m not too sure about.  It didn’t go badly but I couldn’t read the interviewer’s body language or face – no visual feedback at all.

Now, I care.  I really want this job.  It’s down to just two or three of us, from about 10 who were interviewed.  Hopefully, I’ll know by the end of this week. Fingers crossed that someone is away and that’s what’s holding up the reference checks and final decision.  The waiting is the stressful part.  I’d do both interviews all over again if it meant not having this period of not knowing and having no control over the process! Argh. Stay tuned.

And that, my friends, is my life in a nutshell for the past month.  Unless you live in a bubble, its World Cup time which means my free time is taken up with matches and talking to other fans about the Beautiful Game.  Pretty soon, you’ll also be inundated with running/walking updates as my “official” training for the half marathon in October begins Sunday.  Le sigh.


Barbara Bruederlin said...

How lovely that your other kitties are stepping in to help fill the void. I am sure they miss their brother too.

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